Perth or What I did on my holiday by Bill O aged 27.5

Tourist definition: "Perth is the major city on the west coast of Australia with 1.9 million inhabitants and the capital of Western Australia (the biggest state in Australia), also the most isolated city in the world. It lies on the Swan River which also hosts the port of Fremantle. Between the river and the beaches most of Perth's beauty and attractions revolve around the water. Climate is anything from pleasant to hot to humid to chucking it down in rain but usually its pleasant (according to me thats 23-32 degrees, sunny and light breezes). It is a windy city though with a strong sea breeze most evenings."

I couldve just shown a photo to say that:

Perth is an important financial centre - easy with only 8 cities you say but as WA contains most of Australia's mineral resources the CBD/West Perth are home to most of Australia's major and junior mining companies. Its convenient when your company's head office is in your home city - you could argue that the proximity to all this mining led to my career but in fact most of the workforce in these companies is from other states or New Zealand. Choice bro.But for Bill Perth is not just a place. Perth is home and therefore includes much much more. Lets be Portuguese and start with food. Yes theres the iconic barbies. But how about Szechaun sausage with bubble tea at 1am as a way to sober up?! Cuisine consists of or is influenced by anything thats been brought with our many immigrants. While I was back I had Thai, Vietnamese, Italian, Turkish bread with hummus (may not sound special but if I say Ankara those who know will understand), nachos (again not so unique but I made them and they were damn good - satay chicken nachos with guacamole). I missed Indian, Greek, Indonesian, African and thats just the specialty restaraunts. Most cafes have at least one curry, one noodle/stir-fry dish, pasta dishes or dishes like chilli mussels or chicken soup with coriander and rice noodles or grilled chorizo, dishes now thought to be "Australian".

Of course there was a few nights out too - Perth "entertainment" tries to marry the English pub with the Latin al fresco and usually comes up with drinking beer outside in the sun, near water where possible. Theres only half a million mock English/Irish pubs. Aussie beer is changing too from the ice cold refreshment used to cool you down while drinking in the sun to more English, fuller flavoured ales or pilseners. And no-one drinks Fosters.

My home suburb of Mount Lawley was orginally declared a "dry" suburb by its founder. Which means my usual haunts the Queens and the Inglewood are seperated by a good 2kms. Controversially one of the cafes managed to morph into the Flying Scotsman around 10 years ago which means theres a handy refreshment stop around 1.4kms into the walk. For some reason the Scotto has always looked like this to me when Ive walked past over the last 10 years and its nice to see it hasnt changed.
There are some more worrying changes to Perth, especially when it comes to urban planning.
Dont panic potential tourist. Perth is not riddled with cross-dressing prostitutes. Only sometimes when fancy dress themes for birthday parties get stretched to the limits of a velvet slip dress padded with balloons :) Other special occasions like Australia Day get explosions and alcohol as befits the anniversary of the English running aground to start a penal colony in a foreign country using their rules (ignoring subtle details like the people already there, the climate and the lack of water).

The normal Australia Day celebration in Perth is drinking smuggled alcohol (public drinking is illegal in Australia) from midday thus getting completely drunk and stupid and missing the fireworks through being passed out or arrested. Departing from the norm we relaxed on a balcony drinking mango daquiris (Bills recipe - 1.5 caps bacardi, 1 mango, lots of ice, mix, blend, drink), tequila sunrises, eating homemade gourmet mini-pizzas and crackers double stacked with grape and brie, with the cricket and the Hottest 100 on in the background. Only when the sun was setting did we venture to the waterfront to watch the sky light up. To enhance the fireworks experience a commercial FM station puts together an soundtrack of Australian commerical hits (ie pub rock standards and ex-Neighbours pop) from the last 30 years. Unfortunately we had no radio. Luckily someone decided to rise to the occasion and describe the fireworks for the benefit of all, well more acting as an early warning system "It's coming, it's coming". And so is Christmas. In fact it was "sparkling like a Christmas tree" (poetry m'dear). As his excitement grew during the frenzied finale he began to shout "Rocket coming, rocket coming" or "Big Rocket coming". I suspect his day job is narrating porn movies.

Somehow my time in Perth coincided with the 2 one-day cricket internationals. Coincidence - I think not ;) Those who dont like sport or can't understand cricket might appreciate the spectacle - since we don't particularly like our national flag everyone dresses in green and gold (not canary yellow) meaning a full and colourful WACA. Not so colourful is the rubbish thrown during the mexican wave or the fights between aggro drunks. Its strange how pissed you can get on mid-strength (only beer sold in the ground). Anyone else seeing a pattern between smuggled booze, drunken idiots and typical "Aussie" celebrations? Those who appreciate cricket will understand the joy in seeing Gilly smacking 100 off 88 balls. WA's isolation from the rest of Australia makes us a little parochial when it comes to sport, economics, in fact anything really. Dont get me started on how much of Australia's export earnings we contribute. So even if its Australia playing the crowd will be supporting half the team a little more.
To this mix of what Perth is and what I do with it I add some emotion - the strange feeling of not having my own home in my hometown, the frantic juggle to sort out my "affairs" (no not those - packing my belongings into storage and trying to work out what needs to be paid or cancelled or changed), the effort to achieve all the work things I wanted to do, and the desire to catch up with everyone and spend time with those I love. The welcoming hug of home can become constricting when you add to it the pressure of your own expectations. I reckon I did none of those well but somehow I managed to do them all - drinking at the Ingie, the Queens and out the back of 209, eating at the Boatshed, Little Creatures, Sienas and the Red Orchid, lunch in West Perth without wanting to go back to work, meetings where I forgot all the important items I was going to push for, playing beach volleyball everywhere but at the beach, sleeping on the grass in the sun at the WACA, walking around the Swan, even singing "The Gambler" on Cathys birthday, yes, all of my normal life. Perth never seems to change when I go back, it lets me slot back in like I never went away. It was a shock to be back in the middle of it rather than only able to observe and react through the detachment of email. Most important was seeing that everyone was OK, that life moves on, quicker for some, slower for others, the same battles and frustrations or exciting and incomprehensible new challenges. It seems a lot now when I look back on it and the delay in blogging it partly represents an attempt to reflect. Contradictions abound - Im more relaxed yet more determined, Im glad to be back yet wish Id had more time at home, its nice to be alone again yet if anything Im missing people more, I dont really feel like talking yet Im spilling my guts on a blog. Im back in Portugal and it doesn't seem like I left here either. Confused? I am.